Saturday, January 31, 2009

Joy In The Midst Of The Storm

After spending my Saturday morning filling up 15 cans of gas and loading up 5 generators to send back to my parents to stay alive, I realized that this ice storm sucks. My hometown was featured on Good Morning America due to the damage all over town (Imagine being on life-support through a 5000 watt generator from Home Depot). It's been a rough and cold week for the area but tomorrow we've got that football game they play between GoDaddy commercials. I don't know about you but I've got my "What The F#%k Blanket" ready to go for a fine weekend of sports. You better believe I'm staying warm while holding a baby and telling a racist joke. I might even read in broad daylight. (Might be the lack of sleep, but, I absolutely love this video.)

[via The Big Lead]

Friday, January 30, 2009

Can't We Just Pay Him To Jump Off A Bridge?

Ever wonder why foreign countries are always burning American flags in protest? It's because we allow assholes like this to post things on the internet. True story. But back to this jumping off a bridge thing. The guy DID say he would entertain by performing a stupid dare. Sounds fair to me.


I Still Hate You. But This Helps.

Tails Never Fails

That guy thats always on ESPN2 at 4am and kinda looks like Tiger Woods is going balls to the wall for the Super Bowl. While I spread my $20 bets across the props sheet, Phil Ivey is throwing down $1,000,000 on a single bet. Holy shit man, I thought I enjoyed gambling. Some say I drop more coin on football games than Michael J. Fox at a parking meter but this is just ludicrous. Ivey refuses to say who he took but I'm guessing he went straight for the coin toss. Betting 7 figures on the spread would be too nerve-racking and only lead to a late, meaningless field goal to break your heart. The coin toss gets straight to the point and avoids all of the drama. Tails never fails, Phil. Good luck.

Top 5 Reasons Why I Love Hating Pittsburgh

1.) "The White and The Plastic Ivories (We Aint Got Kire)"

2.) The Terrible ShamWow

3.) Creepy Families With YouTube (Incest?)

4.) This Girl

5.) Jeff Reed's Douchery

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

.5 Second Three Pointer

Romo Loves His Offensive Line

I can't tell if this is Tony Romo's woman or if his offensive tackle Marc Colombo stood in for her at the 99.9 KISS Country Chili Cookout in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida. Either way, it's not attractive. Hopefully, she saved some chili for everyone else. How do you mess this up? Then again, how do you mess this up?


Monday, January 26, 2009

Why didn't we have Youtube in high school?

Just think, this guy gives better analysis than a third of the ESPN Gameday crew!