Friday, January 23, 2009

El Borracho's 2009 NFL Mock Draft (#1-10)

The 2009 NFL Draft is only three months away and everyone seems to think they have it figured out. I'm already tired of hearing Mel Kiper's analysis on the draft, so I thought to myself- if he can do it, why can't I? So, I decided to join in on the action. Here is the official HG Halftime Report 2009 NFL Mock Draft. It appears that I don't see it the same way Kiper does but I believe that I have some solid picks. Here are the first ten...

#1.) Detroit Lions: Willie Beaman - QB (Miami Sharks)
After taking over for the injured Jack Rooney, Willie Beaman proved to be a headcase for the Miami Sharks. Beaman caused tension between coaches and teammates, frequently changed the playcall, and even asked out the team owner's daughter. Then, late in the season, Beaman completely turned it around and became the team leader. Coach Tony D'Amato and injured Jack Rooney managed to channel Beaman's energy and convert him into a top-notch QB. The Lions are in desperate need for a playmaking quarterback and I believe that while in Detroit, Willie can "keep the ladies creamin' and the fans' screamin'. He's Willie Beaman..."

#2.) St. Louis Rams: Billy Bob - OT (West Canaan H.S.)
Steve Spagnuolo said in his introductory press conference that he wants to really emphasize the running game. Also, Orlando Pace is still under contract for three more years. I don't know if he'll last that long, but he'll at least be back for 2009. Billy Bob can fill that left side tackle spot alongside Pace next season. Billy Bob suffered a near career ending concussion last season but managed to play through the pain while blocking for all-state quarterback Lance Harbor and then backup Jonathon "Mox" Moxon.

#3.) Kansas City Chiefs: Shane Falco - QB (Washington Sentinels)
After a league-wide strike from contract negotiations sent first string QB Eddie Martel to the house, Falco revived his career that many were considering to be over. Prior to the resurgence, Falco was nicknamed "Footsteps" for his nervousness and fear of the blitz after his lackluster performance in the 1996 Sugar Bowl with Ohio State. But after stepping into the starting role under new coach Jimmy McGinty, Falco led the Sentinels to a championship season. Now that Pioli is in as GM in Kansas City, he needs a fresh face to step in to revive the Chiefs franchise. I think Shane Falco is just the man to do it. I just don't know where he can park that houseboat.

#4.) Seattle Seahawks: Rod Tidwell - WR (Arizona)
There is no doubt in Rod Tidwell's game. He will show you the endzone if you show him the money. This is an easy decision for Seattle right here. Bobby Engram, 36, will be hitting free agency. Deion Branch, who is always hurt, could be a cap casualty. Nate Burleson stinks and is coming off a torn ACL. The rest of the wideouts are terrible. If the Seahawks don't address the position, they can have fun struggling offensively next year. Or, they can just SHOW HIM THE MONEY!

#5.) Cleveland Browns: Earl Meggert - RB (Allenville Penitentiary)
Meggert has the speed and agility to be a franchise back in the NFL. Character issues are the only question mark. With the season that the Browns just had, new head coach Eric Mangini needs to roll the dice and draft this potential playmaker. Look out AFC North, here comes the boom (boom) y'all don't really want it now.

#6.) Cincinnati Bengals: Jimmy Dix - QB (Los Angeles Stallions)
With Carson Palmer's banged up knee, the Cincinnati quarterback situation is up in the air. I think Jimmy Dix is the perfect fit for the Bengals system. Dix has been out of the league on a four year suspension for gambling on his own team but he will be eligible for the 2009 season. After the recent death of his stripper girlfriend, Dix assisted in the investigation and claims that he has turned his life around. Do we believe him? No. He's a troublemaker. But, it's the Bengals. They still have Chris Henry on the roster.

#7.) Oakland Raiders: Becky "Icebox" O'Shea - ATH (Urbania, OH)
Becky O'Shea aka "The Icebox" is one of the few versatile players in this year's draft. She is a perfect fit for Oakland as she is just a hard nosed player with football in her blood. Her father Danny coached her Little Giants Peewee football squad to a win in the championship game over the powerhouse rival Cowboys, coached by Becky's heisman winner uncle, Kevin O'Shea. If Junior Floyd and "Hot Hands" are available later in the draft, could we see the "Annexation of Puerto Rico" in Oakland?

#8.) Jacksonville Jaguars: Bobby Boucher - LB (Louisiana Cougars)
The Jacksonville Jaguars defense is struggling. They were plagued by injury all season long and then came the infamous Mike Peterson/Jack Del Rio drama. Peterson is most likely on his way out, therefore, Boucher is on his way in. I don't see how they could go in any other direction if Boucher is still on the board here. The hard hitting linebacker is a perfect fit for the Del Rio system.

#9.) Green Bay Packers: Boobie Miles - RB (Permian H.S.)
A torn ACL that ended his senior year is the only thing holding Boobie Miles back from being the #1 overall pick of the draft. If he falls to #9, Green Bay will be all over him to compliment the already established passing offense. Miles was considered arrogant and cocky as a youngster but many believe that the injury has sparked Boobie's determination and focus.

#10.) San Francisco 49ers: Ronnie "Sunshine" Bass - QB (T.C. Williams)
The Mike Singletary era in San Fran officially begins in 2009 and what better way to start it off than by bringing in California native Ronnie Bass. Bass has the best arm out of all the movie quarterbacks and he is a pure pocket passer. Surround him with a good offensive line and lookout for a breakout rookie season as "Sunshine" will feel right at home in the Sunshine state.

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